Oh mother dearest – please don’t worry about controlling that 3 foot beast running down the condiment isle. Seeing that you forgot to grab the child leash so charmingly disguised as a monkey, I’m sure you are feeling just a bit overwhelmed. After all, how does one expect a mother to manage a shopping cart and child without a Labrador-like restraining device? And yes, the high pitched screaming and tantrum throwing is perfectly acceptable considering the circumstances.
So, don’t mind us as we reach around your precious angel for a jar of Vlasic bread and butter chips. And as for the minor traffic jam your “little peanut” has created at the intersection of juice and crackers – no worries. We didn’t really have anything else to do today. We’ll just wait until you and all of the other parents finish counting to three before we scope out the Chex Mix inventory. That’s when something magical happens, right? Thank goodness you were bestowed the gift of counting to three slowly enough to create the illusion that your little terror mysteriously saw the light and adopted a socially acceptable demeanor.
If you would like, I’m happy to join in on the counting next time. Because let’s be realistic… we’re going to share this experience again once we hit the cookie isle. And as friendly warning, I may not be as patient if your little sweetie pie comes between me and the Double Stuff.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment